Something about the irrational suicidal mind

THE FOLLOWING IS A PERSONAL RANT ABOUT SUICIDAL TENDENCIES. IT CAN BE TRIGGERING FOR MANY PEOPLE. IT IS ALSO MERELY MY OPINION. STATISTICAL DATA MAY BE CONTRARY TO WHAT I SAY. I HAVEN'T RESEARCHED IT. READER DISCRETION IS STRONGLY ADVISED.

When someone takes their own life, it can be quite confusing for people who have never come close to crossing that line. Those of us who have been there have no confusion. No matter how different the situations are, the end is usually the same. People wonder how someone with so much going for them could want to die. They ask about the love that they get from family and friends. They make the mistake of seeing it through the eyes of a rational human being.

I'll note that some people ARE being rational. There are rare cases where someone decides to beat a fatal illness or injury to the chase. Many of those cases are perfectly rational. Those cases aren't like most, though. Most suicide is irrational.

The irrational suicidal mind often knows about the good in their life, but doesn't care. The only thing that matters to it is the darkness. It wants an end to the pain and doesn't see any options other than death. That's why it's so hard to keep someone from ending it. There's an irrational sense of determination.

When I was caught with a handful of pills, I was physical stopped. It took hours of police custody for me to want to live. When I was caught strangling myself, I snapped out of it after a while but it was far from instant. When I was talked out of dehydrating myself, it took a while for a whole group of people to start to break through to me. It always comes down to that darkness and determination, in the irrational suicides. 

If you've been in similar situations, you know exactly what I mean. If you've never been there, I hope this helped shed some light on the irrational suicide mind.